Although it’s impossible to categorize an entire culture, we’ve compiled a list with some
key highlights and distinctions of Cambodian culture that will make your time much
more enjoyable.
Showing Respect in Cambodia
As with most of Asia, to “lose one's cool” in public is completely unacceptable.
Never shout at someone or criticize them in front of others.
Cambodians don’t typically show strong emotions in public, so don’t be alarmed
if they remain stoic in an emotional situation. Cambodians may also be
uncomfortable if you choose to show strong emotions in public.
Some Cambodians will giggle nervously or smile when they feel uncomfortable
with the strong emotion being expressed.
When offered a gift, it’s polite to refuse it at first, but in the end, always accept it
very graciously with both hands.
Give and receive gifts, money, and business cards with both hands. It’s a sign of
respect.
Be sure to give genuine compliments to people when they are merited.
Because of Cambodia's tough past, do not bring up sensitive subjects such as
war, violence, the Killing Fields, current politics, or the Khmer Rouge.
When gesturing with your hands to “come here”, it’s considered rude to gesture
with your palm up. Always have your palm down, and use all four fingers.
When using a tooth pick, you should cover your mouth with your spare hand.
In many Southeast Asian countries the head is considered the highest and most spiritual
part of a person’s body. The feet are considered the dirtiest and least sacred.
Don’t pat children or adults on the head.
Don’t gesture with your feet.
Don’t raise your feet higher than someone’s head.
When seated on the ground, women should attempt to hide their feet by
tucking them underneath themselves. Men should sit Indian style.
Remove your shoes and hat when entering a home.
Greeting People in Cambodia
The traditional Cambodian greeting, known as Som Pa, is made by putting your
two hands together (with fingertips near the chin) and a giving a slight bow with
your head. The hands are held higher to show more respect to elders.
Many Cambodians choose to shake hands with visitors, so the best rule-of-thumb
is simply to return whatever greeting you were given initially. It is considered very
rude not to return a greeting.
Pointing with your index finger is considered rude. Instead, gesture with your right
hand palm-up.
During conversations many Cambodians don’t make eye contact. Direct eye
contact is usually reserved for emotional conversations. Prolonged direct eye
contact can be interpreted as physical aggression or attraction.
Proper Dress in Cambodia
Modest dress is the rule in Cambodia, particularly for women.
Women should not wear short skirts or show their shoulders.
Men usually wear collared shirts and long pants.
Although many tourists wear shorts to deal with the heat, the locals tend to cover
as much skin as possible. While it is not a rule, pants or capris for women are safe
and acceptable.
Although tourism has caused these standards to relax somewhat, it’s always best
to dress conservatively to show respect.
Interacting with the Opposite Sex
It may come as a surprise to many, especially because sex trafficking is a rampant
problem in Cambodia, but Cambodians strongly frown upon public displays of
affection.
Couples, even if they are married, shouldn’t hold hands or kiss in public.
Be mindful in your contact with the opposite sex, even placing an arm around a
local to pose for a picture can be misinterpreted.
Women should never touch a monk or hand anything to him; even the monk's
mother may not do so.
Cambodian males will hold hands with and hug other Cambodian males; this is a
sign of friendship, nothing more.
When gesturing for someone to “come here” with your hands, using one finger is
considered romantic. Always have your palm down and use all four fingers to
show respect.
Respect for Elders
Aside from monks, elders are given the highest level of respect in Cambodia.
Always acknowledge an elder's status by allowing them to control the
conversation, walk first, and take the lead.
When seated, you should attempt to never sit higher than the eldest person in
the room.
73
Always wait for the eldest to sit and eat first.
Photos
Ask for permission before taking any photos.
Try not to take photos with three people in the photo. Some older Cambodians
think that it is bad luck, especially to be the person in the middle of the photo.85
You have reached the end of this 30-day devotional. You may feel a little more
nervous, overwhelmed, humbled, dependent upon God – and all of these things are
okay. It is God working through you who will make a difference in the lives of the
Cambodians you are going to serve
Thursday, October 4, 2018
Day 29: Saving Face
You are in Cambodia, and one afternoon you decide to take a brief outing. You are
walking down on the riverfront and you stop to ask a Cambodian which direction it is to
a particular restaurant someone has recommended to you. The Cambodian smiles
politely at you, listens to your question and, still smiling, points you in a direction. After
walking in the humidity and heat for twenty-five minutes and finally giving in, hailing a
tuk-tuk, and finding out that the restaurant was only about two minutes in the
completely opposite direction from where you had stopped to ask for directions, you
are livid.
Why did the seemingly friendly Cambodian
lie to you and give you bad directions? Was it
malicious? Did he not like foreigners? Was he
trying to send you down a rabbit trail?
Probably not. More than likely, the
Cambodian simply did not know the answer
but did not want to “lose face” by admitting
that he did not. Most Cambodians would
rather act with confidence than risk embarrassment or lose the respect of others, even if
it means sending you in the wrong direction.
The concept of “saving face” originates from China, but is has certainly spread to other
cultures.82 Saving face refers to the maintaining of one’s reputation and standing in
society.83 This means that in order to save face, you do everything to avoid
embarrassment.
Since “saving face” is such an embedded part of the Cambodian culture, it is
necessary to understand that it will impact your communication. It will be difficult to see
where this practice is at work, but where you sense that someone may not be telling
you something as it is, consider that it may not be from a malicious intent to lie, but an
attempt to save face.
While it would be great to give you an easy “how-to” guide to communicating in a
“saving face” culture, the reality is that it takes years to learn how to navigate
communication, just as it takes years for a low-context communicator to learn how to
communicate in a high-context communication society. We can give you a couple of pointers here, but be ready to be flexible, to be understanding, and to swallow your
pride when you believe that you have been lied to and wronged.
The following suggestions will be helpful to keep in mind:
Avoid pointing out someone's mistakes openly in front of their peers or strangers. If
you believe that someone is in the wrong and needs to be corrected or assisted –
for example, you are helping a staff person learn a new software or are tutoring a
student in a subject – do not correct them in front of the rest of their peers. Instead,
take them to the side and work with them to see how to complete the task
correctly. They may still feel embarrassed in front of you, but you have at least
eliminated their embarrassment in front of their peers and others.
Make sure to give sincere compliments when they are merited as it helps people to
increase “face” in front of their peers.
Show extra respect to elders, military or other people of uniform.84
Navigating within a new culture, new language, and new people will bring daily
stresses, frustrations, and will stretch you in new and different ways. Spend time in prayer
today that God would specially prepare your heart for the challenges in
communication that will likely arise during your trip.
walking down on the riverfront and you stop to ask a Cambodian which direction it is to
a particular restaurant someone has recommended to you. The Cambodian smiles
politely at you, listens to your question and, still smiling, points you in a direction. After
walking in the humidity and heat for twenty-five minutes and finally giving in, hailing a
tuk-tuk, and finding out that the restaurant was only about two minutes in the
completely opposite direction from where you had stopped to ask for directions, you
are livid.
Why did the seemingly friendly Cambodian
lie to you and give you bad directions? Was it
malicious? Did he not like foreigners? Was he
trying to send you down a rabbit trail?
Probably not. More than likely, the
Cambodian simply did not know the answer
but did not want to “lose face” by admitting
that he did not. Most Cambodians would
rather act with confidence than risk embarrassment or lose the respect of others, even if
it means sending you in the wrong direction.
The concept of “saving face” originates from China, but is has certainly spread to other
cultures.82 Saving face refers to the maintaining of one’s reputation and standing in
society.83 This means that in order to save face, you do everything to avoid
embarrassment.
Since “saving face” is such an embedded part of the Cambodian culture, it is
necessary to understand that it will impact your communication. It will be difficult to see
where this practice is at work, but where you sense that someone may not be telling
you something as it is, consider that it may not be from a malicious intent to lie, but an
attempt to save face.
While it would be great to give you an easy “how-to” guide to communicating in a
“saving face” culture, the reality is that it takes years to learn how to navigate
communication, just as it takes years for a low-context communicator to learn how to
communicate in a high-context communication society. We can give you a couple of pointers here, but be ready to be flexible, to be understanding, and to swallow your
pride when you believe that you have been lied to and wronged.
The following suggestions will be helpful to keep in mind:
Avoid pointing out someone's mistakes openly in front of their peers or strangers. If
you believe that someone is in the wrong and needs to be corrected or assisted –
for example, you are helping a staff person learn a new software or are tutoring a
student in a subject – do not correct them in front of the rest of their peers. Instead,
take them to the side and work with them to see how to complete the task
correctly. They may still feel embarrassed in front of you, but you have at least
eliminated their embarrassment in front of their peers and others.
Make sure to give sincere compliments when they are merited as it helps people to
increase “face” in front of their peers.
Show extra respect to elders, military or other people of uniform.84
Navigating within a new culture, new language, and new people will bring daily
stresses, frustrations, and will stretch you in new and different ways. Spend time in prayer
today that God would specially prepare your heart for the challenges in
communication that will likely arise during your trip.
Day 28: Power Distance
In the past few days we have been looking at ways Cambodian culture is different from
other cultures – particularly Western – such as how different cultures perceive time and
how they communicate. Today we will be looking at another issue one must address in
order to be effective in his or her ministry in Cambodia – power distance.
Power distance is the extent to which people who are less powerful in society – whether
youth, subordinate employees, lower class persons, etc. – will accept inequality in
power and consider that inequality to be normal. According to power distance theory,
there is inequality in power in every society, but the degree to which individuals within
that society will tolerate it varies.77 There are two types of power distances: high-power
distance and low-power distance.
In high-power distance countries and organizations, people don't question the
decisions of their leaders. Leader-follower relationships are not close and followers
expect to have their jobs and responsibilities dictated to them. In some cases, they will
not articulate disagreements with authority for fear of the consequences for stirring up
conflict. High-power distance societies perceive a clear delineation between superiors
and subordinates and between the young and the old, and they place high value on
obedience, respect and allegiance to superiors.78 Cambodia is a country with a highpower
distance culture where people expect leaders and followers to maintain their
roles in the social structure, both in the workplace, but also in everyday life between
elders and youth, parents and children, and other class, age, and societal distinctions.
Low-power distance countries, such as the United States, tend to have more
decentralized hierarchies and they encourage individualism and experimentation.79
Low-power distance individuals are expected to and are more comfortable with
voicing their opinions, even if it contradicts a supervisor’s word.80 Relationships outside
of the workplace – in families and other community groups – also tend to be less formal.
While elders and parents are given a certain degree of respect, individuals are often still
expected to make their own decisions according to their own best interests.
Since Cambodia is a high-power distance culture, it’s important that you show proper respect to those in authority. It is also important for you to know that as a foreigner, you
will be perceived as an honored guest, or person of authority yourself. Many
Cambodians, including AIM staff, may become uncomfortable if you break out of a
perceived hierarchical structure. For example: In an attempt to be kind, you decide to
go into the kitchen of a ministry site and make a meal for the Cambodian cook. While
your intention is to bless and honor him or her, the cook may become embarrassed or
uncomfortable that the honored guest is serving the staff. It may even be perceived as
insulting – that the cook’s service was not up to your standards or taste to the point that
you had to prepare the food yourself.
Because you will be viewed as a person of
authority by most Cambodians, you can use
this position to bless the staff and those you
are there to serve. One of the best ways to
serve Cambodians is to publicly praise and
give words of affirmation to those by whom
you have been blessed. Your words will give
them honor among their peers, followers
and/or superiors, and will allow you to serve
and encourage the staff while not making
them uncomfortable because of power
distance.
At the start of Jesus’ ministry, He went out to the desert to be baptized by John. As He
“came up out of the water, immediately He saw the heavens being torn open and the
Spirit descending on Him like a dove. And a voice came from heaven, ‘You are my
beloved Son; with you I am well pleased.’ The Spirit immediately drove Him out into the
wilderness.”81
God the Father affirmed Jesus publicly in His ministry. It was both a tangible reminder to
Jesus as well as an encouragement, particularly with the trials He was to face
immediately thereafter in the wilderness and in the years to come. Your words have the
power to build up the Cambodian staff by giving them honor and by encouraging
them. Remember that you are only there for a limited time, but it will be up to them to
face the challenges of the days and years ahead to continuously love and show Jesus’
love to the Cambodian people.
Regardless of what you think or how you feel about the high-power distance culture,
consider how you can operate within it to bless and to minister while you are in
Cambodia. Spend time in prayer asking God to prepare you to recognize and take
opportunities to bless others and bring glory to His name.
other cultures – particularly Western – such as how different cultures perceive time and
how they communicate. Today we will be looking at another issue one must address in
order to be effective in his or her ministry in Cambodia – power distance.
Power distance is the extent to which people who are less powerful in society – whether
youth, subordinate employees, lower class persons, etc. – will accept inequality in
power and consider that inequality to be normal. According to power distance theory,
there is inequality in power in every society, but the degree to which individuals within
that society will tolerate it varies.77 There are two types of power distances: high-power
distance and low-power distance.
In high-power distance countries and organizations, people don't question the
decisions of their leaders. Leader-follower relationships are not close and followers
expect to have their jobs and responsibilities dictated to them. In some cases, they will
not articulate disagreements with authority for fear of the consequences for stirring up
conflict. High-power distance societies perceive a clear delineation between superiors
and subordinates and between the young and the old, and they place high value on
obedience, respect and allegiance to superiors.78 Cambodia is a country with a highpower
distance culture where people expect leaders and followers to maintain their
roles in the social structure, both in the workplace, but also in everyday life between
elders and youth, parents and children, and other class, age, and societal distinctions.
Low-power distance countries, such as the United States, tend to have more
decentralized hierarchies and they encourage individualism and experimentation.79
Low-power distance individuals are expected to and are more comfortable with
voicing their opinions, even if it contradicts a supervisor’s word.80 Relationships outside
of the workplace – in families and other community groups – also tend to be less formal.
While elders and parents are given a certain degree of respect, individuals are often still
expected to make their own decisions according to their own best interests.
Since Cambodia is a high-power distance culture, it’s important that you show proper respect to those in authority. It is also important for you to know that as a foreigner, you
will be perceived as an honored guest, or person of authority yourself. Many
Cambodians, including AIM staff, may become uncomfortable if you break out of a
perceived hierarchical structure. For example: In an attempt to be kind, you decide to
go into the kitchen of a ministry site and make a meal for the Cambodian cook. While
your intention is to bless and honor him or her, the cook may become embarrassed or
uncomfortable that the honored guest is serving the staff. It may even be perceived as
insulting – that the cook’s service was not up to your standards or taste to the point that
you had to prepare the food yourself.
Because you will be viewed as a person of
authority by most Cambodians, you can use
this position to bless the staff and those you
are there to serve. One of the best ways to
serve Cambodians is to publicly praise and
give words of affirmation to those by whom
you have been blessed. Your words will give
them honor among their peers, followers
and/or superiors, and will allow you to serve
and encourage the staff while not making
them uncomfortable because of power
distance.
At the start of Jesus’ ministry, He went out to the desert to be baptized by John. As He
“came up out of the water, immediately He saw the heavens being torn open and the
Spirit descending on Him like a dove. And a voice came from heaven, ‘You are my
beloved Son; with you I am well pleased.’ The Spirit immediately drove Him out into the
wilderness.”81
God the Father affirmed Jesus publicly in His ministry. It was both a tangible reminder to
Jesus as well as an encouragement, particularly with the trials He was to face
immediately thereafter in the wilderness and in the years to come. Your words have the
power to build up the Cambodian staff by giving them honor and by encouraging
them. Remember that you are only there for a limited time, but it will be up to them to
face the challenges of the days and years ahead to continuously love and show Jesus’
love to the Cambodian people.
Regardless of what you think or how you feel about the high-power distance culture,
consider how you can operate within it to bless and to minister while you are in
Cambodia. Spend time in prayer asking God to prepare you to recognize and take
opportunities to bless others and bring glory to His name.
Day 27: Social Paradigm – Collective v. Individualistic
Cultures differ in how people relate to their society and how their identities are defined.
In individualistic societies, the goals of individuals are valued more highly than
the goals of the group. Individuals are rewarded for behaving independently,
making their own plans, and working toward achieving their personal goals. In
these societies, individuals are hired and promoted largely based on individual
achievement and qualifications.
In collectivist societies, the goals of the individuals are subordinated to the
group’s needs. In these societies, kinship and group ties are stronger and carry
great weight in decisions about hiring and promotion, even if another candidate
may be more highly qualified.73 People are born into a group to which they owe
loyalty and from which they expect protection. Their relationships and friendships
are determined by membership in their respective group. As life progresses,
people join other groups; for example, when they start working, they join a staff
or group of employees.74 Identity is not isolated; it is determined by the collective
views of the larger group. Likewise, what a person does and how one conducts
oneself is determined by group needs.75
Marriage, for example, provides a basic lens through which to understand the
differences between collectivist and individualistic societies. In countries such as India
or Pakistan, marriages are often arranged and are viewed as opportunities to form
family or business alliances. Children are expected to marry whomever the family
chooses based on the needs of the family. In other countries where arranged marriage
is not common, however, children marry whoever they choose. It is their decision and
they choose based on their own preferences, needs and desires. The preferences of
the individual take precedence over the welfare and preferences of the family.
Similar examples may be drawn from what an individual may choose to study or work.
Students from a collectivistic culture, for example, may be sent to another country to
study whatever their government, company or family needs and not necessarily what they want to pursue. The needs of the group – whether family, company, or country –
take precedence over the individual’s desires.76
In Cambodia, it is all too often that young women “choose” to work in karaoke bars,
beer gardens, or massage parlors because their families put pressure on them to bring
home as much money as possible. Even if families know what actually goes on in such
locations (refer to Day 23 for more information), and even if young women are abused
and do not want to continue, the family pressure is often stronger than the preferences
of the young woman, even if it is to the young woman’s extreme detriment.
When people from individualistic cultures see these types of practices and coercion, it is
easy for the members of one culture to think, “Our way is better.” In our ignorance and
pride, we tend to see cultural differences in terms of good versus bad, right versus
wrong. While it is certainly the case that
certain practices are “bad” and sinful –
forcing one’s daughter into trafficking, for
example – it is not the case that all practices
that are different from our own are inherently
wrong or somehow less than ours.
Instead of judging, we need to understand
these differences and their implications for
ministry. Because Cambodia is a collectivist
society, it is necessary to minister to the entire
family unit and community, not just to individuals. In Svay Pak, putting on the children’s
ministry is not enough to protect the children and to provide for their needs. Unless their
families and, indeed, the entire community, also meet Jesus, they will continue to sell
their children to pimps and pedophiles each night, and the violence in the children’s
lives will persist. The ministry in Svay Pak conducted at Rahab’s House consists not only
of Kid’s Club each day but also medical clinics, the Lord’s Gym, brick factory outreach,
the Rahab’s House School, and discipleship, all of which are put on by the church to
share Jesus’ love with the entire community.
On your trip you may be asked to minister to a church member’s drunk uncle, and you
may find yourself asking, “I thought I was here to stop sex trafficking.” What you may
not realize is that in sharing Jesus with the drunk uncle, you are rescuing his nephew or
niece from being trafficked each night.
Spend some time in prayer that while you and your team are in Cambodia on your
short-term mission, God would use your work, even if seemingly indirect, to carry out His
larger plan to rescue His children from sex trafficking. Ask that you would be prepared
to be His hands and feet to Cambodia, to even the most undesirable of His people.
In individualistic societies, the goals of individuals are valued more highly than
the goals of the group. Individuals are rewarded for behaving independently,
making their own plans, and working toward achieving their personal goals. In
these societies, individuals are hired and promoted largely based on individual
achievement and qualifications.
In collectivist societies, the goals of the individuals are subordinated to the
group’s needs. In these societies, kinship and group ties are stronger and carry
great weight in decisions about hiring and promotion, even if another candidate
may be more highly qualified.73 People are born into a group to which they owe
loyalty and from which they expect protection. Their relationships and friendships
are determined by membership in their respective group. As life progresses,
people join other groups; for example, when they start working, they join a staff
or group of employees.74 Identity is not isolated; it is determined by the collective
views of the larger group. Likewise, what a person does and how one conducts
oneself is determined by group needs.75
Marriage, for example, provides a basic lens through which to understand the
differences between collectivist and individualistic societies. In countries such as India
or Pakistan, marriages are often arranged and are viewed as opportunities to form
family or business alliances. Children are expected to marry whomever the family
chooses based on the needs of the family. In other countries where arranged marriage
is not common, however, children marry whoever they choose. It is their decision and
they choose based on their own preferences, needs and desires. The preferences of
the individual take precedence over the welfare and preferences of the family.
Similar examples may be drawn from what an individual may choose to study or work.
Students from a collectivistic culture, for example, may be sent to another country to
study whatever their government, company or family needs and not necessarily what they want to pursue. The needs of the group – whether family, company, or country –
take precedence over the individual’s desires.76
In Cambodia, it is all too often that young women “choose” to work in karaoke bars,
beer gardens, or massage parlors because their families put pressure on them to bring
home as much money as possible. Even if families know what actually goes on in such
locations (refer to Day 23 for more information), and even if young women are abused
and do not want to continue, the family pressure is often stronger than the preferences
of the young woman, even if it is to the young woman’s extreme detriment.
When people from individualistic cultures see these types of practices and coercion, it is
easy for the members of one culture to think, “Our way is better.” In our ignorance and
pride, we tend to see cultural differences in terms of good versus bad, right versus
wrong. While it is certainly the case that
certain practices are “bad” and sinful –
forcing one’s daughter into trafficking, for
example – it is not the case that all practices
that are different from our own are inherently
wrong or somehow less than ours.
Instead of judging, we need to understand
these differences and their implications for
ministry. Because Cambodia is a collectivist
society, it is necessary to minister to the entire
family unit and community, not just to individuals. In Svay Pak, putting on the children’s
ministry is not enough to protect the children and to provide for their needs. Unless their
families and, indeed, the entire community, also meet Jesus, they will continue to sell
their children to pimps and pedophiles each night, and the violence in the children’s
lives will persist. The ministry in Svay Pak conducted at Rahab’s House consists not only
of Kid’s Club each day but also medical clinics, the Lord’s Gym, brick factory outreach,
the Rahab’s House School, and discipleship, all of which are put on by the church to
share Jesus’ love with the entire community.
On your trip you may be asked to minister to a church member’s drunk uncle, and you
may find yourself asking, “I thought I was here to stop sex trafficking.” What you may
not realize is that in sharing Jesus with the drunk uncle, you are rescuing his nephew or
niece from being trafficked each night.
Spend some time in prayer that while you and your team are in Cambodia on your
short-term mission, God would use your work, even if seemingly indirect, to carry out His
larger plan to rescue His children from sex trafficking. Ask that you would be prepared
to be His hands and feet to Cambodia, to even the most undesirable of His people.
Day 26: Communication – High v. Low Context
Communication may seem to be very black and white – you either know a language
and can communicate with someone, or you do not – but the truth is that the manner
and style in which ideas are communicated are entirely different in other cultures, and
go far beyond a simple language barrier.
In America, the style of communication typically used is classified as low-context
communication. In this style, one focuses more on the literal meanings of actual words
used rather than relying on non-verbal cues to fully interpret meaning. This type of
culture and communication style does well with written words, in which the entirety of
the meaning is dependent upon the words themselves to convey a message.68
Conversely, Cambodia is classified as using a high-context communication style. In this
style, groups use spoken words and non-verbal cues to comprehend what is being
communicated. To fully understand what the speaker intends, a listener must employ
their ability to “read between the lines.” In this style, it is important to listen and observe
concurrently, but even someone from a low-context culture who is highly skilled in both
may still find it difficult to fully grasp a high-context communicator’s meaning.69
In general terms, “high-context” refers to societies or settings that have longestablished,
deep connections. Because of the depth of connection between the
members of the group, much of the communication is understood by implication and
less is stated explicitly.70 Your family would most likely be a good example of a highcontext
group. Other examples of high-context situations might be a party of close
friends, a small church congregation, or a formal restaurant where the rules of behavior
and underlying cues are understood without having to be spelled out.
To most people from low-context communication societies, high-context
communication seems to be very indirect. For example, a friend says that he is hungry
but cannot leave his work to buy food. For a low-context person, this means that the
friend will be hungry until he finishes work, but a high-context person may get the signal
that his friend would like for him to pick up food for him. Saying this directly would
appear to be overly demanding to a high-context individual, but by telling his friend
that he is hungry, another high-context individual will be able to detect the cues and will be placed in a position of offering to pick up food.71 While it may seem that the
high-context individual is talking around what he wants, he is actually giving significant
signals that he expects the listener to understand.
Learning to understand high-context communication cultures is very difficult and takes
years. In the above example, what is going on reflects communication style, but also
other cultural preferences. By hinting that he would like for someone to pick up food,
the high-context communicator saves face if the friend were to refuse, and the friend
has the power to offer or not. Because there are so many cultural influences at work,
give yourself grace as you try to listen and connect with people in Cambodia.
If you are a low-context and direct communicator, you must be careful in how you
communicate with and perceive things from a high-context and indirect
communicator. You may think that they are being evasive, dishonest, can’t take a
stand, have no opinion, or that they are increasing tension by not dealing with issues
directly. Before this becomes your mindset, however, remember the things you have
learned about their culture and ask yourself questions such as, “What is the context
behind what they are saying?” and, “What is the point they are trying to convey?”
You must also be careful of what you might be communicating unintentionally. For
example, if you are sharing at a church in Cambodia with parents of children who are
unable to go to school and you say, “It would be great if someone built a school for all
these children,” a Cambodian listener might think you are stating that you want to
finance the building of a school.
Read Acts 2. There, years after God chose to muddle the languages at the Tower of
Babel, He made it possible for everyone in Jerusalem to understand what the apostles
were saying, each in their own native language. Though some remained incredulous,
God, through the Holy Spirit, spoke to the hearts of many in the crowd that day, “and
there were added that day about three thousand souls.”72
Even as much as God made the disciples’ words bear fruit, God can use your words to
bring glory to His name and serve others in Cambodia. As you are getting ready for
your trip to Cambodia, know that you will probably make mistakes and interpret
something incorrectly in your conversations with Cambodians. This kind of cultural
communication adjustment doesn’t happen overnight and in fact takes years. Spend
time in prayer today and ask God to give you wisdom and grace as you communicate
His love to the AIM staff and all of those you will be ministering to on your trip.
and can communicate with someone, or you do not – but the truth is that the manner
and style in which ideas are communicated are entirely different in other cultures, and
go far beyond a simple language barrier.
In America, the style of communication typically used is classified as low-context
communication. In this style, one focuses more on the literal meanings of actual words
used rather than relying on non-verbal cues to fully interpret meaning. This type of
culture and communication style does well with written words, in which the entirety of
the meaning is dependent upon the words themselves to convey a message.68
Conversely, Cambodia is classified as using a high-context communication style. In this
style, groups use spoken words and non-verbal cues to comprehend what is being
communicated. To fully understand what the speaker intends, a listener must employ
their ability to “read between the lines.” In this style, it is important to listen and observe
concurrently, but even someone from a low-context culture who is highly skilled in both
may still find it difficult to fully grasp a high-context communicator’s meaning.69
In general terms, “high-context” refers to societies or settings that have longestablished,
deep connections. Because of the depth of connection between the
members of the group, much of the communication is understood by implication and
less is stated explicitly.70 Your family would most likely be a good example of a highcontext
group. Other examples of high-context situations might be a party of close
friends, a small church congregation, or a formal restaurant where the rules of behavior
and underlying cues are understood without having to be spelled out.
To most people from low-context communication societies, high-context
communication seems to be very indirect. For example, a friend says that he is hungry
but cannot leave his work to buy food. For a low-context person, this means that the
friend will be hungry until he finishes work, but a high-context person may get the signal
that his friend would like for him to pick up food for him. Saying this directly would
appear to be overly demanding to a high-context individual, but by telling his friend
that he is hungry, another high-context individual will be able to detect the cues and will be placed in a position of offering to pick up food.71 While it may seem that the
high-context individual is talking around what he wants, he is actually giving significant
signals that he expects the listener to understand.
Learning to understand high-context communication cultures is very difficult and takes
years. In the above example, what is going on reflects communication style, but also
other cultural preferences. By hinting that he would like for someone to pick up food,
the high-context communicator saves face if the friend were to refuse, and the friend
has the power to offer or not. Because there are so many cultural influences at work,
give yourself grace as you try to listen and connect with people in Cambodia.
If you are a low-context and direct communicator, you must be careful in how you
communicate with and perceive things from a high-context and indirect
communicator. You may think that they are being evasive, dishonest, can’t take a
stand, have no opinion, or that they are increasing tension by not dealing with issues
directly. Before this becomes your mindset, however, remember the things you have
learned about their culture and ask yourself questions such as, “What is the context
behind what they are saying?” and, “What is the point they are trying to convey?”
You must also be careful of what you might be communicating unintentionally. For
example, if you are sharing at a church in Cambodia with parents of children who are
unable to go to school and you say, “It would be great if someone built a school for all
these children,” a Cambodian listener might think you are stating that you want to
finance the building of a school.
Read Acts 2. There, years after God chose to muddle the languages at the Tower of
Babel, He made it possible for everyone in Jerusalem to understand what the apostles
were saying, each in their own native language. Though some remained incredulous,
God, through the Holy Spirit, spoke to the hearts of many in the crowd that day, “and
there were added that day about three thousand souls.”72
Even as much as God made the disciples’ words bear fruit, God can use your words to
bring glory to His name and serve others in Cambodia. As you are getting ready for
your trip to Cambodia, know that you will probably make mistakes and interpret
something incorrectly in your conversations with Cambodians. This kind of cultural
communication adjustment doesn’t happen overnight and in fact takes years. Spend
time in prayer today and ask God to give you wisdom and grace as you communicate
His love to the AIM staff and all of those you will be ministering to on your trip.
Day 25: Perception of Time – Event Time v. Clock Time
In Western cultures, most people have a tight schedule. Breakfast at 8 a.m., work from 9
a.m. to 5 p.m. with a lunch break at noon, dinner at 6 p.m., meet with Jim at 8:30 p.m.,
bed by 11 p.m., and repeat. For the most part we run on an organized day using what
is called “clock-time,” where everything is, as it sounds, scheduled on an external clock.
Our days are thought out, planned, and prepared for “making the most” of our day
and being as productive with our time as possible. Western culture is very futureoriented,
constantly focused on what needs to be done and by when, in order to keep
moving on and to be the most productive.
In Cambodia, along with many other countries, people run on what is called “eventtime.”
In event-time, a schedule would look much more like this: when breakfast ends,
work begins. When one feels that he has accomplished enough for the day, it is time for
dinner. When dinner is done and he feels ready, he can go meet with Jim, and once he
is tired, he will go to bed.66 People run their days by an internal clock; they are focused
on one task at a time and the present.
In clock-time cultures, showing up five to ten minutes after the set time is considered
permissibly late, 15 to 20 minutes after is late, and 30 minutes and beyond after the set
time is considered insultingly late. But in event cultures it is considered permissibly late if
someone is thirty to 45 minutes after the set time. One to two hours after the set time is
considered late, and two to three hours after the set time is considered insultingly late. For many who are accustomed to running on clock-time, this concept of running by an
internal clock is frustrating. It may seem that people do not care, are being
disrespectful, or that they are being unproductive with their time, but that is not the
case. Though event-time may not seem to be the most productive, studies suggest that
both event- and clock-time have to potential to perform well.67
If people are showing up “late” or your schedule is not happening when you exactly
planned it out, don’t freak out. Take a deep breath. You are going to be okay! Realize
that you are not on a mission trip just to accomplish a list of tasks. You are on God’s time
in a new culture and if you are focused on the ultimate thought of just bringing glory to
Him and showing His love, then He will use you wherever you are and through whatever
you are doing.
Read John 4. How does Jesus manage His time? Does He run by clock-time or eventtime?
Jesus and His disciples were on their way to Galilee and stopped to rest. While
sitting at the well, He built a relationship with the woman and stayed at the well waiting
on His disciples and then again waiting for the woman to come back. Who knows how
long that could have been! He was presented with a choice: keep with His plans and
go to Galilee or stay for a bit longer and minister to the Samaritans. What does Jesus
do? He postpones His plans for TWO DAYS! Jesus knew that, yes, plans are important,
but if you are doing the will of God and obeying His commands, then God gives you
the time you need to accomplish what He wants you to do, just as in Joshua 10 when
God literally stopped the sun for the Israelites to have the time they needed to defeat
their adversaries.
Take a moment to consider these questions:
About a week ago, you looked at the difference between making your “results”
people- and process-focused rather than projects- and products-oriented. Remember
that your goal on this trip is not to create specific quantifiable results and that
transformation happens along relational lines that take time to develop. Just as Jesus
operated based on the relational needs of the Samaritan woman and community, be
prepared to operate based on the relational needs of the AIM staff, a community
member, child, or one of your teammates.
Spend some time in prayer asking God to prepare you for what might change, that
when and if the time comes that your plans do not go exactly as you expected, He will
give you a peace and be your firm ground.
a.m. to 5 p.m. with a lunch break at noon, dinner at 6 p.m., meet with Jim at 8:30 p.m.,
bed by 11 p.m., and repeat. For the most part we run on an organized day using what
is called “clock-time,” where everything is, as it sounds, scheduled on an external clock.
Our days are thought out, planned, and prepared for “making the most” of our day
and being as productive with our time as possible. Western culture is very futureoriented,
constantly focused on what needs to be done and by when, in order to keep
moving on and to be the most productive.
In Cambodia, along with many other countries, people run on what is called “eventtime.”
In event-time, a schedule would look much more like this: when breakfast ends,
work begins. When one feels that he has accomplished enough for the day, it is time for
dinner. When dinner is done and he feels ready, he can go meet with Jim, and once he
is tired, he will go to bed.66 People run their days by an internal clock; they are focused
on one task at a time and the present.
In clock-time cultures, showing up five to ten minutes after the set time is considered
permissibly late, 15 to 20 minutes after is late, and 30 minutes and beyond after the set
time is considered insultingly late. But in event cultures it is considered permissibly late if
someone is thirty to 45 minutes after the set time. One to two hours after the set time is
considered late, and two to three hours after the set time is considered insultingly late. For many who are accustomed to running on clock-time, this concept of running by an
internal clock is frustrating. It may seem that people do not care, are being
disrespectful, or that they are being unproductive with their time, but that is not the
case. Though event-time may not seem to be the most productive, studies suggest that
both event- and clock-time have to potential to perform well.67
If people are showing up “late” or your schedule is not happening when you exactly
planned it out, don’t freak out. Take a deep breath. You are going to be okay! Realize
that you are not on a mission trip just to accomplish a list of tasks. You are on God’s time
in a new culture and if you are focused on the ultimate thought of just bringing glory to
Him and showing His love, then He will use you wherever you are and through whatever
you are doing.
Read John 4. How does Jesus manage His time? Does He run by clock-time or eventtime?
Jesus and His disciples were on their way to Galilee and stopped to rest. While
sitting at the well, He built a relationship with the woman and stayed at the well waiting
on His disciples and then again waiting for the woman to come back. Who knows how
long that could have been! He was presented with a choice: keep with His plans and
go to Galilee or stay for a bit longer and minister to the Samaritans. What does Jesus
do? He postpones His plans for TWO DAYS! Jesus knew that, yes, plans are important,
but if you are doing the will of God and obeying His commands, then God gives you
the time you need to accomplish what He wants you to do, just as in Joshua 10 when
God literally stopped the sun for the Israelites to have the time they needed to defeat
their adversaries.
Take a moment to consider these questions:
- How will being in an event-time culture challenge me?
- How can I be preparing myself for those challenges?
About a week ago, you looked at the difference between making your “results”
people- and process-focused rather than projects- and products-oriented. Remember
that your goal on this trip is not to create specific quantifiable results and that
transformation happens along relational lines that take time to develop. Just as Jesus
operated based on the relational needs of the Samaritan woman and community, be
prepared to operate based on the relational needs of the AIM staff, a community
member, child, or one of your teammates.
Spend some time in prayer asking God to prepare you for what might change, that
when and if the time comes that your plans do not go exactly as you expected, He will
give you a peace and be your firm ground.
Day 24: Cultural Preparation – Understanding the Different Types of Sex Trafficking in Cambodia
Many people, when they think of sex trafficking, have a limited view of what this form of
exploitation entails. One common image that may come to mind is of a small child,
kidnapped from her parents or purchased from a rural village in Vietnam, transported
over the border to Cambodia and sold to foreign men in a dirty brothel along with
hundreds of other girls. While this perception is not wrong, the truth is that it is only one
of many examples of sex trafficking in Cambodia.
Today, you will read briefly about some of the most common forms of sex trafficking in
Cambodia, but it is important first that you deal with one very common but displaced
stigma on women and children in prostitution. Prostitution, in Cambodia and in the rest
of the world, goes hand-in-hand with sex
trafficking. Sex trafficking, as a crime, exists
where a person who is underage64 or by
force, fraud or coercion, has been
purchased and sold for sex—there is no
requirement that the person be transported.
This means that not only are kidnapping
victims who are bought and sold for sex
considered victims of trafficking, but also any
person in prostitution who is being controlled
by a pimp or brothel owner should be
considered a trafficking victim as well. Furthermore, coercion takes many forms—any
person who is in prostitution because of poverty, economic coercion, racism, a lack of
alternatives because of other stigmas or limitations placed upon her (she is the child of
prostitution, a minority, a non-citizen, an orphan, a victim of sexual abuse, etc.) is
trafficked. What may appear to be “choice” by a woman or child to sell sex is actually
coercion by the circumstances of their lives and depravity of their society.
It is crucial that we avoid placing stigma or judgment on any person we see in systems
of prostitution or trafficking because these are the very women and children you are
going to Cambodia to serve. Some of them will be easier to love than others, but it is
important that you remember the circumstances in their lives that have led them to
where they are today. Trafficking in Cambodia, as elsewhere in the world, takes many forms. The following are
typical examples of a few:
Child trafficking: Svay Pak, where AIM operates Rahab’s House I and II, the
Agape Training Center, Lord’s Gym, and the Rahab’s House School, was known
as the epicenter of child sex-trafficking in Cambodia. Tourists from all over the
world would travel to Svay Pak, about eleven kilometers outside of Phnom
Penh,65 to purchase the youngest and most vulnerable for sex. Most of the
children being bought and sold in Svay Pak came from Vietnam, rural
Cambodia, or Svay Pak itself. Most were typically taken through fraud or
coercion from their families, though some families may well know what is
happening and are complicit in the exploitation. Until about 2005, children were
sold out of brothels to pedophiles, but after many of these brothels were raided
by police, traffickers developed new tactics. Svay Pak is no longer the epicenter
it once was, but trafficking still persists, albeit more covertly. Now, when
pedophiles would come into town, a trafficker negotiates meeting places and
prices for the child to be exploited elsewhere.
Massage Parlor Trafficking: Many young women and children are also exploited
in massage parlors. Most of the young women in massage parlors are older than
the children exploited in Svay Pak, and their coercion takes a different form.
When customers, both foreign and domestic, come to the massage parlor,
prices and terms are negotiated. While the massage parlor may offer massages,
other forms of sexual conduct may also be available for customers to request.
The women who work at these massage parlors are typically expected to meet
customers’ requests, regardless of whether they want to or not, because it helps
to earn the massage parlor more revenue than basic massage services.
Karaoke bars are now one of the most common forms of entertainment and
exploitation in Cambodia. Karaoke bars employ young women to keep
customers entertained while they sing karaoke. In most bars, sex doesn’t occur
on the premises, but customers negotiate meeting places and times with bar
managers or the young women. Women are expected to make and keep these
appointments, and they have to pay fees to the karaoke bar, their drivers, and
often the hotels where the meetings occur. Holding these appointments offpremises
allows bar owners to claim that they are not brothels, but in most cases,
women are forced by their employers, at times with physical violence, to make
and take “dates,” even with customers who appear very dangerous. Many women and girls working at karaoke bars appear to be able to come and
go as they please, but they often have pressure from their families to work there
in order to send money home. While it may appear that it is their choice to be
there, it is important to understand that family pressure keeps them there as well
as cultural stigma if they try to leave and seek employment elsewhere.
Beer gardens are essentially bars or clubs where customers come to socialize,
drink and party. Similar to karaoke bars, young women are employed to serve
customers in beer gardens, and customers often make arrangements with the
women or managers to meet off-premises. Like in karaoke bars, the women have
little say in refusing customers, and while they have the freedom to quit their work
at the beer garden, because of the social stigma placed on them for having
engaged in that work, they are often left with few other opportunities.
Furthermore, like the girls working at karaoke bars, most of them are there
because of family pressure to make money to send home.
AIM does outreach to and works with young women and children who have been
subjected to trafficking in each of these different forms. Even where it may appear to
be a young woman’s choice to remain where she is, it is important that you understand
that the coercion and circumstances for why she is there vary. Rahab’s House-Siem
Reap is located within walking distance of a karaoke bar and was started specifically to
reach out to girls in these bars throughout the city. The center holds medical clinics, runs
a beauty salon, offers ESL and other types of classes, and provides opportunities for the
girls to leave the karaoke bars if they do not want to return (see page 32 of the
Appendix for more information about Rahab’s House-Siem Reap). The volunteers and
staff in Siem Reap are dedicated to demonstrating consistent and ongoing love for the
girls trafficked in the karaoke bars, and it has been through this type of consistent
presence and outreach that they have begun to make an impact in the community
and have seen many girls begin to transition out of the bars.
Read John 8:3-11. It is not your place to pass judgment, nor is it your place to think of
yourself as higher than you ought. Remember from earlier days in this devotional that
you are not going to Cambodia to rescue, to pity, or to look down upon those you
have come to serve, but rather that you are going in order to serve and to glorify God.
Here are some questions to consider:
exploitation entails. One common image that may come to mind is of a small child,
kidnapped from her parents or purchased from a rural village in Vietnam, transported
over the border to Cambodia and sold to foreign men in a dirty brothel along with
hundreds of other girls. While this perception is not wrong, the truth is that it is only one
of many examples of sex trafficking in Cambodia.
Today, you will read briefly about some of the most common forms of sex trafficking in
Cambodia, but it is important first that you deal with one very common but displaced
stigma on women and children in prostitution. Prostitution, in Cambodia and in the rest
of the world, goes hand-in-hand with sex
trafficking. Sex trafficking, as a crime, exists
where a person who is underage64 or by
force, fraud or coercion, has been
purchased and sold for sex—there is no
requirement that the person be transported.
This means that not only are kidnapping
victims who are bought and sold for sex
considered victims of trafficking, but also any
person in prostitution who is being controlled
by a pimp or brothel owner should be
considered a trafficking victim as well. Furthermore, coercion takes many forms—any
person who is in prostitution because of poverty, economic coercion, racism, a lack of
alternatives because of other stigmas or limitations placed upon her (she is the child of
prostitution, a minority, a non-citizen, an orphan, a victim of sexual abuse, etc.) is
trafficked. What may appear to be “choice” by a woman or child to sell sex is actually
coercion by the circumstances of their lives and depravity of their society.
It is crucial that we avoid placing stigma or judgment on any person we see in systems
of prostitution or trafficking because these are the very women and children you are
going to Cambodia to serve. Some of them will be easier to love than others, but it is
important that you remember the circumstances in their lives that have led them to
where they are today. Trafficking in Cambodia, as elsewhere in the world, takes many forms. The following are
typical examples of a few:
Child trafficking: Svay Pak, where AIM operates Rahab’s House I and II, the
Agape Training Center, Lord’s Gym, and the Rahab’s House School, was known
as the epicenter of child sex-trafficking in Cambodia. Tourists from all over the
world would travel to Svay Pak, about eleven kilometers outside of Phnom
Penh,65 to purchase the youngest and most vulnerable for sex. Most of the
children being bought and sold in Svay Pak came from Vietnam, rural
Cambodia, or Svay Pak itself. Most were typically taken through fraud or
coercion from their families, though some families may well know what is
happening and are complicit in the exploitation. Until about 2005, children were
sold out of brothels to pedophiles, but after many of these brothels were raided
by police, traffickers developed new tactics. Svay Pak is no longer the epicenter
it once was, but trafficking still persists, albeit more covertly. Now, when
pedophiles would come into town, a trafficker negotiates meeting places and
prices for the child to be exploited elsewhere.
Massage Parlor Trafficking: Many young women and children are also exploited
in massage parlors. Most of the young women in massage parlors are older than
the children exploited in Svay Pak, and their coercion takes a different form.
When customers, both foreign and domestic, come to the massage parlor,
prices and terms are negotiated. While the massage parlor may offer massages,
other forms of sexual conduct may also be available for customers to request.
The women who work at these massage parlors are typically expected to meet
customers’ requests, regardless of whether they want to or not, because it helps
to earn the massage parlor more revenue than basic massage services.
Karaoke bars are now one of the most common forms of entertainment and
exploitation in Cambodia. Karaoke bars employ young women to keep
customers entertained while they sing karaoke. In most bars, sex doesn’t occur
on the premises, but customers negotiate meeting places and times with bar
managers or the young women. Women are expected to make and keep these
appointments, and they have to pay fees to the karaoke bar, their drivers, and
often the hotels where the meetings occur. Holding these appointments offpremises
allows bar owners to claim that they are not brothels, but in most cases,
women are forced by their employers, at times with physical violence, to make
and take “dates,” even with customers who appear very dangerous. Many women and girls working at karaoke bars appear to be able to come and
go as they please, but they often have pressure from their families to work there
in order to send money home. While it may appear that it is their choice to be
there, it is important to understand that family pressure keeps them there as well
as cultural stigma if they try to leave and seek employment elsewhere.
Beer gardens are essentially bars or clubs where customers come to socialize,
drink and party. Similar to karaoke bars, young women are employed to serve
customers in beer gardens, and customers often make arrangements with the
women or managers to meet off-premises. Like in karaoke bars, the women have
little say in refusing customers, and while they have the freedom to quit their work
at the beer garden, because of the social stigma placed on them for having
engaged in that work, they are often left with few other opportunities.
Furthermore, like the girls working at karaoke bars, most of them are there
because of family pressure to make money to send home.
AIM does outreach to and works with young women and children who have been
subjected to trafficking in each of these different forms. Even where it may appear to
be a young woman’s choice to remain where she is, it is important that you understand
that the coercion and circumstances for why she is there vary. Rahab’s House-Siem
Reap is located within walking distance of a karaoke bar and was started specifically to
reach out to girls in these bars throughout the city. The center holds medical clinics, runs
a beauty salon, offers ESL and other types of classes, and provides opportunities for the
girls to leave the karaoke bars if they do not want to return (see page 32 of the
Appendix for more information about Rahab’s House-Siem Reap). The volunteers and
staff in Siem Reap are dedicated to demonstrating consistent and ongoing love for the
girls trafficked in the karaoke bars, and it has been through this type of consistent
presence and outreach that they have begun to make an impact in the community
and have seen many girls begin to transition out of the bars.
Read John 8:3-11. It is not your place to pass judgment, nor is it your place to think of
yourself as higher than you ought. Remember from earlier days in this devotional that
you are not going to Cambodia to rescue, to pity, or to look down upon those you
have come to serve, but rather that you are going in order to serve and to glorify God.
Here are some questions to consider:
- What are my preconceived notions about sex trafficking in Cambodia?
- What are my preconceived notions about the people to whom we will be ministering?
- How do I serve and love without judgment or bias and with a humble heart?
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